ʻO 1 i ka 5 o kāu mau hoaaloha e kiʻi nei iā Kinky - Pono paha ʻoe?

Anter

• E hoʻi kāua i kahi manawa iki: He aha ke kūpono e like me ke kink?
• Hiki ke pōmaikaʻi ke kinky wahine i kekahi ala pūʻiwa
• Ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana i nā kuhi kinky kuhi hewa, stereotypes, a me nā kaʻao
• Makemake nā wahine i ka kink
• ʻAʻole ʻoe "pupule" e hoʻāʻo iā BDSM
• ʻAʻole pono ʻoe i ka lako hana moemoeā nui
• Ke mālama nei i ka pāʻani leʻaleʻa a palekana hoʻi
• Hoʻomaka nā mea āpau me ka ʻae
• ʻAʻohe mea hoʻomākeʻaka nā ʻōlelo palekana
• E noʻonoʻo e pili ana (a kamaʻilio e pili ana) i kāu "palena paʻakikī"
• E ʻoluʻolu ʻoluʻolu ka ʻeha - a me ka ʻole o ka hopena olakino
• He mea nui ka mālama ʻana ma hope
• E hoʻomanaʻo: ʻo ka moe kinky ka mea āu e makemake ai

Makemake ka hapalua o ka lehulehu i ka kink

ʻO ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana i nā kikoʻī pili loa o kāu ola wahine he kapu loa ia. Akā inā ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke kamaʻilio e pili ana me kāu mau hoaaloha pili, ke lawe mai nei i loko o ka lumi moe e ʻoi aku ka maʻalahi?

Inā ʻaʻole no ka erotica mainstream a me nā ponokala kiʻi palupalu (hello, "Fifty Shades of Grey"), ʻaʻole paha ʻoe i ʻike nui e pili ana i ka hoʻokolohua ʻana me nā palena i loko o ka lumi moe. A inā ʻaʻole no ka ʻike inoa ʻole, ʻaʻole paha mākou e ʻike i ka nui o nā ʻAmelika i hoʻāʻo - a makemake - ke kuʻi nei a me ke nakinaki ʻana i kekahi i kekahi.

ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo ua hoʻāʻo paha kekahi o kāu mau hoaaloha - a hoʻokahi o ka ʻelima e lilo i ʻāpana o kā lākou pāʻani maʻamau i ka lumi moe. Wahi a ka, ʻoi aku ma mua o 22 ka pākēneka o nā mākua hana kolohe e hana i ka pāʻani ʻana, ʻoiai ʻoi aku ma mua o 20 pākēneka i hana i ka nakinaki ʻia a me ka paʻi ʻana.

Mahalo hou aku paha? Ua ʻike ʻia kahi noiʻi hou e kokoke ana i ka hapalua o ka poʻe 1,040 i nānā ʻia e hoihoi i ka kink, ʻoiai inā ʻaʻole i loaʻa iā lākou ka manawa kūpono e mākaʻikaʻi ai. A ke ulu nei ka noiʻi e loaʻa ana ka adventurous i loko o ka lumi moe i hiki ke loaʻa i nā keu he nui, no kou olakino a me kou pilina.

E hoʻi kāua i kahi manawa iki: He aha ke kūpono e like me ke kink?

ʻOiai ʻaʻohe huaʻōlelo a kink paha ka wehewehe ʻana o ka huaʻōlelo kink, he hana maʻamau ka wahine e hāʻule i waho o ka ʻaha kūkā - manaʻo nui ʻia nā hana e like me ke aloha aloha, kamaʻilio aloha, honi ʻana, komo i loko o ka pūhaka, masturbation, a me ka moekolohe waha. "Kink" ponoʻī e pili ana i kēlā me kēia mea e kūlou aʻe mai ka "pololei a me ka haiki," ʻoiai aia kekahi mau mahele e hāʻule pinepine ma lalo o ka malu kinky.

• ʻO BDSM. Ke manaʻo ka hapanui o ka poʻe i ka moekolohe kinky, noʻonoʻo lākou iā BDSM, kahi huaʻōlelo ʻehā e kū nei eono nā mea like ʻole: Hoʻopaʻa, Kaʻopaʻi, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, a me Masochism. Pākuʻi ʻia ʻo BDSM i nā hana he nui loa, mai ka hoe hoe māmā a me ka hana nui / hoʻolohe ʻana i nā hana hoʻokau a me nā pāʻani ʻeha.
• Fantasy a me ke pāʻani ʻana i ke kūlana. ʻO kekahi o nā ʻano maʻamau o ka moekolohe kinky e pili ana i ka hoʻokumu ʻana i nā hanana i manaʻo ʻia. He mea maʻalahi paha kēia e like me ke kamaʻilio ʻana e pili ana i kahi moemoeā i kahi moe, i ka paʻakikī e like me ke kau ʻana i nā kapa komo a i ʻole ke hana ʻana i nā hiʻohiʻona i mua o nā malihini.
• Fetishes. Hoʻokahi o nā kāne a me nā wahine ʻehā e hoihoi i ka pāʻani fetish, i wehewehe ʻia e like me ka mālama ʻana i kahi mea nonsexual a i ʻole ʻāpana kino i ka wahine. ʻO nā fetish maʻamau ka hoʻopili ʻana i nā wāwae a me nā kāmaʻa, ka ʻili a i ʻole ka pauka, a me nā pāʻani diaper (ʻae).
• ʻO Voyeurism a i ʻole hōʻikeʻike. ʻO ka nānā ʻana i kahi mea e ʻaʻahu ʻole a nānā ʻana paha i ka moe kolohe o nā kāne me ka ʻike ʻole he mau moemoeā voyeur maʻamau, ʻoiai ka moekolohe ʻana ma kahi lehulehu kahi ʻano hōʻike. He mea kupanaha nā mea ʻelua (a me kinky) - 35 pākēneka o nā mākua i nīnau ʻia e hoihoi i ka voyeurism.
• Pūʻulu hui. He ʻekolu mau makahiki, nā ʻaoʻao moekolohe, nā hui pū, a me nā mea hou aʻe - ʻo ka moekolohe pūʻulu kekahi hana e pili ana i nā mea ʻelua. a ʻo 18 pākēneka o nā kāne i komo i ka moekolohe pūʻulu, ʻoiai ʻo nā pākēneka ʻoi aku ka kiʻekiʻe i hōʻike i ka hoihoi i ka manaʻo.

Hiki ke pōmaikaʻi ke kinky wahine i kekahi ala pūʻiwa

E hoʻolohe i ka ʻepekema ma mua: hiki i ke kinky wahine ke kōkua iā ʻoe e ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi a me ke olakino noʻonoʻo. Ua ʻike ʻia kekahi o nā loea mana nui a hoʻolohe hoʻi o BDSM:

• emi neurotic
• ʻoi aku extroverted
• hāmama hou i nā ʻike hou
• ʻoi aku ka ʻike
• emi rejection-ikepili koʻikoʻi

Ua ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ko lākou pono kuʻuna i hoʻohālikelike ʻia i ka pūʻulu hoʻomalu. ʻO kēia paha he ʻelua mau mea: ʻumeʻume ʻia ka poʻe me kēia ʻano i ka moekolohe kinky, a i ʻole ke kinky wahine hiki ke kōkua iā ʻoe e ulu a loaʻa ka hilinaʻi. Akā hiki nō paha ka mea hope loa, keu hoʻi e noiʻi hou e pili ana i nā hopena o ka moekolohe kinky.

ʻO kahi laʻana, ʻike ʻia he mau haʻahaʻa haʻahaʻa ka haʻahaʻa o ka hormone stress cortisol, a ua hōʻike pū kekahi i nā manaʻo nui o ka pili pili a me ka pilina ma hope o kā lākou pāʻani moekolohe.

A me kahi loiloi mua o kahi mau lima o "switch" (nā poʻe e hana i ka ʻaoʻao ʻē aʻe a lākou i maʻa ai, e like me kahi dom i lilo i sub) i ʻike ʻia e hiki i ka BDSM consensual ke hōʻemi i ka hopohopo ma o ka lawe ʻana i ka noʻonoʻo i kahi "kahe ”Kūlana o ka ʻike. Ua like kēia me ka manaʻo i loaʻa i kekahi ke ʻike lākou i kahi "runner's high," komo i ka hana ʻana i ke kiʻi, a i ʻole yoga hoʻomaʻamaʻa.

Ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana i nā kuhi kinky kuhi hewa, stereotypes, a me nā kaʻao

ʻAʻole ia he mea kupanaha no ka mea ʻaʻole mākou e kamaʻilio e pili ana i ka moekolohe kinky, nui nā kaʻao a me nā kuhi hewa e lana ana. E hoʻomaʻemaʻe kāua i ka ea ma kekahi mau stereotypes kink maʻamau.

Makemake nā wahine i ka kink

ʻOiai ʻo nā ʻano kikoʻī o ka moekolohe kinky e hoʻopiʻi pinepine i ka wahine hoʻokahi ma mua o ka mea ʻē aʻe - no ka laʻana, makemake nui nā kāne i ka pāʻani fetish wāwae, ʻoiai ʻoi aku ka makemake o nā wahine e ʻeha i ka ʻeha ma ke ʻano he wahine - makemake nā kāne a me nā wahine e ʻimi i nā kink e pili ana. like.

ʻAʻole ʻoe "pupule" e hoʻāʻo iā BDSM

I ka pāpālina mainstream, pili pinepine ʻo BDSM me ka hoʻomāinoino a me ka hana ʻino. Ua kū kekahi mau loea i ka hoʻomaʻau a me ka hoʻokae ma muli o kā lākou kinks. Akā hōʻike nā noiʻi i ka awelika kanaka e komo ana i ka kink consensual i ʻoi aku ka olakino olakino olakino.

ʻAʻole pono ʻoe i ka lako hana moemoeā nui

Hiki ke lele i ka manaʻo ke kiʻi o ka domatrix pale lole ʻili e hoʻohana ana i ka whipa like ke noʻonoʻo ʻoe i ka moekolohe kinky. Akā maoli, ʻo nā mea āu e makemake ai he noʻonoʻo a me kahi hoa e pāʻani ana.

Inā ʻoe e ʻoluʻolu i kekahi mau fetish a i ʻole makemake e ʻimi hou i ka honua, aia nō nā hale kūʻai no kēlā. Akā ʻaʻole kokoke ka hoʻāʻo ʻana i ka kink ma ke ʻano he lako pono e like me, e ʻōlelo ana, e pāʻani ana i ka hoʻokūkū hockey leʻaleʻa kūloko. ʻAʻole pono ʻoe i nā maka maka a i ʻole nā ​​kūpeʻe lima inā ʻoe makemake e pāʻani me ka hoʻonele sensory a i ʻole nā ​​kaohi - hiki ke hana i kahi kaula a uluna paha i nā hihia ʻelua.

Ke mālama nei i ka pāʻani leʻaleʻa a palekana hoʻi

ʻOiai he nui nā pōmaikaʻi ke kinky wahine, a ʻoiai ʻo ia ka mea āu a me kāu hoa e makemake ai, aia kekahi mau mea āu e noʻonoʻo ai i mea leʻaleʻa, palekana, a maikaʻi hoʻi kāu mau ʻimi.

Hoʻomaka nā mea āpau me ka ʻae

ʻO ka ʻae hoʻomaopopo ʻaʻole ia he mea e hana ʻia ma mua o kou alo me kahi hoa hou, he mea ia e pono ai ma mua o ka hana kolohe ʻana, keu hoʻi ke hoʻāʻo nei ʻoe i kahi mea kinky no ka manawa mua. He mea nui ke kamaʻilio ʻana i nā pilina moekolohe olakino, akā nui ia ke ʻimi nei ʻoe i nā kuleana koʻikoʻi / hoʻolohe a i ʻole ʻehaʻeha paha.

ʻAʻohe mea hoʻomākeʻaka nā ʻōlelo palekana

ʻO ka ʻāpana o kāu moemoeā e pili ana i nā kaohi a i ʻole ke kūʻē ʻana - ka mea ʻoi aku ka maʻamau ma mua o kou manaʻo ma waena o nā wahine. E hōʻoia hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻōlelo ʻaʻole i loko o kāu moemoeā, akā he ala nō kāu e ʻōlelo akāka ʻole ai i kāu hoa, e hoʻohana i kahi huaʻōlelo palekana āu i ʻae ai ma mua o kou kinky. Nā huaʻōlelo paʻamau hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻohana kukui ʻulaʻula (kū) a kukui ʻōmaʻomaʻo (hoʻomau).

E noʻonoʻo e pili ana (a kamaʻilio e pili ana) i kāu "palena paʻakikī"

Loaʻa i nā kānaka āpau nā palena a me nā palena. ʻOiai he wehe ʻia i nā hana lumi lumi hou he maikaʻi, he hāmama e pili ana i nā mea āu e makemake ʻole ai e ʻimi (ʻoiai ʻaʻole loa, loa) he mea nui like. Kūkākūkā i kēia mau "palena paʻakikī" me kāu hoa ma ke ākea - ʻaʻohe kumu e coy.

E ʻoluʻolu ʻoluʻolu ka ʻeha - a me ka ʻole o ka hopena olakino

ʻO kahi ʻāpana nui o ka moekolohe kinky e kāwili nei i ka ʻeha a me ka leʻaleʻa. ʻOiai he nui nā kāne e huki ana i ka laina i ka pā māmā a i ʻole ka pā ʻana, ʻo ka poʻe e ʻimi i nā ala ʻē aʻe - e like me ka ʻeha o ka umauma a me ka ʻeha - pono e aʻo iā lākou iho i mea e hana ʻole ai i ka hōʻino koʻikoʻi a lōʻihi paha i nā kiko a me nā aʻa.

He mea nui ka mālama ʻana ma hope

ʻOiai ke komo i ka moekolohe ʻole kinky, hiki i nā wahine ke ʻike i ka "," ʻo ia hoʻi nā ʻōuli e like me ka hopohopo, huhū, a me nā uē kumu ʻole. ʻO ke kūleʻa ʻana i kēia me ka mālama hope ʻana, kahi e hoʻopili ai i ka pilina a me ke kamaʻilio ʻana, he mea nui, ʻo ia hoʻi no BDSM.

No laila, mai hiamoe wale ma hope o ka moekolohe nui. E hōʻoia me kāu pakanā a hōʻoia ua maikaʻi lākou me ka mea i iho i lalo.

E hoʻomanaʻo: ʻo ka moe kinky ka mea āu e makemake ai

Hiki i ke kink ke nānā aku i nā mea ʻokoʻa i nā kāne like ʻole, a ua maikaʻi loa. ʻAʻole pono e hoʻomaka i ka ʻimi ʻana i ka kink me ke kūʻai ʻana i kahi paʻa kino ʻili a me kahi ʻōpala. Hiki iā ia ke maʻalahi e like me ka ʻike ʻana i nā mea e hana ana ke haki ʻoe mai kāu papa lumi lumi maʻamau a komo i kahi honua hou o ka moekolohe.

ʻO nā manaʻo nui o ka moʻo kinky kūleʻa e like me nā pilina ikaika a lōʻihi.

• kamaʻilio
• paulele
• ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana
• ahonui

A i kēia manawa ua ʻike ʻoe ua ʻae ʻia i ka ʻepekema, mai waiho i nā kapu i kūkulu ʻia e ka pilikanaka i mea e makemake ai. Hele i mua a kolohe.

ʻO Sarah Aswell kahi mea kākau manuahi e noho ana ma Missoula, Montana, me kāna kāne a me kāna mau kaikamahine ʻelua. Ua ʻike ʻia kāna kākau ʻana ma nā puke pai e pili pū me The New Yorker, McSweeney's, National Lampoon, a me Reductress. Hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻopā iā ia ʻO Twitter.