Pehea e ʻike ai i nā hōʻailona o ka Manipulation Emotional a me ka mea e hana ai
Anter
- Nā mea e noʻonoʻo ai
- Mālama lākou i ka "ʻaha hoʻokolokolo home"
- Hele kokoke loa lākou
- ʻAe lākou iā ʻoe e ʻōlelo mua
- Wili lākou i nā ʻoiaʻiʻo
- Hoʻopili lākou i ka hoʻomāʻewaʻewa ʻikepili
- Hoʻopili lākou i ka hana hoʻomāinoino bureaucratic
- Hoʻomaikaʻi lākou iā ʻoe no ka haʻi ʻana i nā hopohopo
- Hoʻoemi lākou i kou mau pilikia a pāʻani i kā lākou iho
- Hana lākou e like me ka martyr
- Ke "hoʻomākeʻaka" wale nei lākou ke ʻōlelo lākou i kahi mea kolohe a manaʻo ʻole paha
- ʻAʻole lākou e lawe i ka kuleana
- Hoʻokahi lākou iā ʻoe
- Ke hoʻohewa mau nei lākou iā ʻoe
- Hoʻohana lākou i kāu palekana ʻole iā ʻoe
- Hoʻohana lākou i kou mau manaʻo kūʻē iā ʻoe
- Hoʻohana lākou i nā huakaʻi hewa a ultimatum paha
- Pā ikaika lākou
- Hāʻawi lākou iā ʻoe i ka lāʻau hūnā
- ʻLelo a hana paha lākou i kekahi mea a hōʻole ma hope
- He "mālie loa" lākou i nā manawa a pau i nā manawa pilikia
- Haʻalele lākou iā ʻoe e nīnau nei i kou noʻonoʻo ponoʻī
- He aha e hana ai
- Outlook
Nā mea e noʻonoʻo ai
Hoʻohana pinepine nā mea manipili i ka naʻau i nā pāʻani noʻonoʻo e hopu i ka mana i kahi pilina.
ʻO ka pahuhopu nui ka hoʻohana ʻana i kēlā mana e kaohi i ka mea ʻē aʻe.
Hoʻokumu ʻia kahi pilina olakino ma ka hilinaʻi, ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana, a me ka mahalo pū. Heʻoiaʻiʻo kēia i nā pilina pilikino, a me nā ʻoihana.
I kekahi manawa, ʻimi ka poʻe e hoʻohana i kēia mau mea o ka pilina i mea e pōmaikaʻi ai iā lākou iho ma kekahi ʻano.
Hiki i nā hōʻailona o ka manipona naʻau ke maʻalea. ʻIke pinepine lākou i ka ʻike, keu aku iā lākou ke hiki mai nei iā ʻoe.
ʻAʻole ia he manaʻo no kou hewa kēlā - ʻaʻohe mea kūpono e hoʻopili ʻia.
Hiki iā ʻoe ke aʻo e ʻike i ka manipula a kāpae iā ia. Hiki iā ʻoe ke aʻo e pale aku i kou manaʻo pilikino a me kou olakino pū kekahi.
E nānā mākou i nā ʻano maʻamau o ka manipona o ka naʻau, pehea e ʻike ai iā lākou, a me nā mea hiki iā ʻoe ke hana aʻe.
Mālama lākou i ka "ʻaha hoʻokolokolo home"
Ke noho nei i loko o kāu hānai home, ʻo kou home maoli a i ʻole kahi hale kope punahele wale nō, hiki ke hoʻoikaika.
Inā hoʻomau ka poʻe ʻē aʻe i ka hui ʻana i ko lākou aupuni, hoʻāʻo paha lākou e hana i kahi kaulike ʻole o ka mana.
Ke koi nei lākou i ka ʻona o kēlā wahi, ka mea e haʻalele ai iā ʻoe ma kahi hemahema.
O kahi laʻana:
- “E hele wāwae i koʻu keʻena ke hiki. Nui loa wau ka hana no ka hele ʻana iā ʻoe. ”
- "ʻIke ʻoe i kahi mamao o kahi kalaiwa iaʻu. E hele mai ma ʻaneʻi i kēia pō. ”
Hele kokoke loa lākou
Hiki paha i nā mea manipona kūlohelohe ke lele i kekahi mau kaʻina i ka pae o ka ʻike kuʻuna. "Kaʻana like" lākou i kā lākou mau mea huna pouli a nāwaliwali hoʻi.
ʻO ka mea a lākou e hana maoli nei, ke hoʻāʻo nei e hōʻoluʻolu iā ʻoe e hōʻike i kāu mau mea huna. Hiki iā lākou ke hoʻohana i kēia mau manaʻo kūʻē iā ʻoe ma hope.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Manaʻo wau e pili wale ana mākou i kahi pae hohonu maoli. ʻAʻole wau i hana ʻia ma mua. "
- "ʻAʻole loa wau i haʻi kekahi i kā lākou ʻike me aʻu e like me ʻoe. Makemake maoli ʻia mākou e noho pū i loko o kēia. "
ʻAe lākou iā ʻoe e ʻōlelo mua
He taktika kaulana kēia me kekahi mau pilina ʻoihana, akā hiki ke hana ʻia i kahi pilikino.
Ke makemake kekahi kanaka e hoʻokumu i ka kaohi, e nīnau paha lākou i nā nīnau probing i mea e kaʻana like ai i kou mau manaʻo.
Me ka manaʻo o kā lākou papa huna hūnā, hiki iā lākou ke hoʻohana i kāu mau pane e manipulate ai i kāu mau hoʻoholo.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Auē, ʻaʻole wau i lohe i nā mea maikaʻi e pili ana i kēlā ʻoihana. He aha kou ʻike? ”
- "ʻAe e wehewehe wale ʻoe iaʻu i ke kumu o kou huhū hou iaʻu."
Wili lākou i nā ʻoiaʻiʻo
He haku nā mea manipule manaʻo i ka hoʻololi ʻana i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo me nā wahaheʻe, fibs, a i ʻole misstatements i mea e huikau ai iā ʻoe.
E hoʻonui paha lākou i nā hanana i mea e maʻalahi ai lākou.
Hiki paha iā lākou ke hoʻohaʻahaʻa i kā lākou kuleana i kahi hakakā i mea e loaʻa ai kāu aloha.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Ua nīnau wau i kahi nīnau e pili ana i ka papahana a hele mai ʻo ia iaʻu, e walaʻau ana no ka mea ʻaʻole wau i hana i kekahi mea e kōkua iā ia, akā ʻike ʻoe ke hana nei wau, ʻeā?"
- "Ua uē wau i ka pō holoʻokoʻa a ʻaʻole i hiamoe ka wink."
Hoʻopili lākou i ka hoʻomāʻewaʻewa ʻikepili
Inā hoʻonāukiuki kekahi iā ʻoe me nā helu helu, jargon, a i ʻole nā ʻoiaʻiʻo ke nīnau ʻoe i kahi nīnau, ʻike paha ʻoe i kahi ʻano o ka hoʻokalakupua manaʻo.
Kuhi kekahi mau manipulate i ka loea, a hoʻokau lākou i kā lākou "ʻike" iā ʻoe. He mea maʻamau kēia i nā manawa kālā a kūʻai aku paha.
O kahi laʻana:
- "He hou ʻoe i kēia, no laila ʻaʻole wau e manaʻo e hoʻomaopopo ʻoe."
- "Maopopo iaʻu he nui kēia mau helu nāu, no laila e hele mālie wau i kēia."
Hoʻopili lākou i ka hana hoʻomāinoino bureaucratic
Eia nō naʻe, i loko o ka ʻoihana, hiki i nā manipulated naʻau ke hoʻāʻo e kaupaona iā ʻoe i lalo me nā pepa, ka lole ʻulaʻula, nā kaʻina hana, a i ʻole kekahi mea e hiki ke hele i kou ala.
He kūpono kēia inā e hōʻike ʻoe i ka loiloi a nīnau paha i nā nīnau e huki ai i kā lākou kīnā a i ʻole nāwaliwali i ka nīnau.
O kahi laʻana:
- “E paʻakikī loa kēia iā ʻoe. E kū wale wau i kēia manawa a mālama iā ʻoe iho i ka ikaika. "
- "ʻAʻohe ou manaʻo i ka ʻehaʻeha āu e hana nei nāu."
Hoʻomaikaʻi lākou iā ʻoe no ka haʻi ʻana i nā hopohopo
Inā ʻoe e nīnau a nīnau paha i kahi manaʻo, e pane paha kahi manipulate naʻau i kahi ʻano hakakā a i ʻole e hoʻāʻo e huki iā ʻoe i kahi paio.
Hāʻawi kēia hoʻolālā iā lākou e kaohi i kāu mau koho a hoʻohuli i kāu mau hoʻoholo.
Hiki iā lākou ke hoʻohana i ke kūlana e hoʻohalahala iā ʻoe no ka hōʻike ʻana i kāu mau hopohopo i ka mua.
O kahi laʻana:
- "ʻAʻole maopopo iaʻu ke kumu o kou hilinaʻi ʻole iaʻu."
- "Maopopo iā ʻoe he kanaka hopohopo wale nō wau. ʻAʻole hiki iaʻu ke kōkua iā ia makemake wau e ʻike ma hea ʻoe i nā manawa āpau. "
Hoʻoemi lākou i kou mau pilikia a pāʻani i kā lākou iho
Inā he lā maikaʻi ʻole kou, hiki i kahi manipulate manaʻo ke lawe i ka manawa kūpono e hoʻopuka ai i kā lākou mau pilikia ponoʻī.
ʻO ka pahuhopu e hōʻole ʻole i ka mea āu e ʻike nei i mea e koi ʻia ai ʻoe e kau iā lākou a hoʻoikaika i kou ikehu naʻau i kā lākou pilikia.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Manaʻo ʻoe he maikaʻi ʻole kēlā? ʻAʻole pono ʻoe e hana me kahi cube-mate e kamaʻilio ma ke kelepona i nā manawa āpau. "
- “Mahalo e kou kaikaina. Ua manaʻo wau hoʻokahi wale nō i koʻu ola. "
Hana lākou e like me ka martyr
ʻAe paha kekahi e manipulate i ka naʻau o ka poʻe me ka ʻoluʻolu e kōkua me kekahi mea akā huli a huli a huki i ko lākou mau wāwae a nānā i nā ala e hōʻalo ai i kā lākou ʻaelike.
Hana paha lākou e like me ka hopena o kahi kaumaha nui, a e ʻimi lākou e hoʻohana i kou mau manaʻo i mea e puka ai.
O kahi laʻana:
- “Maopopo iaʻu he pono kēia naʻu. He nui wale kēia, a ua hoʻopiha ʻia wau. "
- “ʻOi aku ka paʻakikī o kēia ma mua o ka nānā. Manaʻo wau ʻaʻole ʻoe i ʻike i ka wā āu i nīnau mai ai iaʻu. "
Ke "hoʻomākeʻaka" wale nei lākou ke ʻōlelo lākou i kahi mea kolohe a manaʻo ʻole paha
Hōʻike hewa ʻia nā ʻōlelo kūpilikiʻi ma ke ʻano he hoʻomākeʻaka a hoʻomākeʻaka paha. Kuhi paha lākou ke ʻōlelo nei lākou i kekahi mea hoʻomākeʻaka, i ka mea a lākou e hoʻāʻo maoli nei e kanu i kahi ʻano kānalua.
O kahi laʻana:
- "E, ua luhi ʻoe!"
- "Inā ʻoe e ala aʻe mai luna mai o kāu pākaukau a hele a puni, ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hele ma waho o ka hanu me ka maʻalahi."
ʻAʻole lākou e lawe i ka kuleana
ʻAʻole e ʻae nā manipulate emosi i ke kuleana no kā lākou mau hewa.
E hoʻāʻo nō naʻe lākou e loaʻa kahi ala e hōʻino ai ʻoe i nā mea āpau. mai kahi hakakā i kahi papahana i kūleʻa ʻole.
Hoʻopau paha ʻoe i ke kala aku, ʻoiai lākou ka hewa.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Ua hana wale wau ia mea no ka nui o koʻu aloha iā ʻoe."
- "Inā ʻaʻole ʻoe i hele i ka polokalamu makana a kāu keiki, hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻopau i ka papahana ma ke ala kūpono."
Hoʻokahi lākou iā ʻoe
Ke hauʻoli ʻoe, ʻike lākou i kahi kumu e lawe ai i ka nānā mai iā ʻoe. Hiki i kēia ke hana i ka manaʻo maikaʻi ʻole.
I ka wā i loaʻa iā ʻoe kahi pōpilikia a i ʻole hemo, e hoʻāʻo paha kahi manipulator naʻau e hana i ko lākou mau pilikia e like me ka ʻoi aku a ʻoi aku paha o ka kaomi.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Maikaʻi loa kāu uku uku, akā ua ʻike ʻoe i kahi mea ʻē aʻe i loaʻa kahi hoʻolaha piha?"
- "E kala mai ua hala kou kupuna kāne. Ua hala wau i koʻu mau kūpuna i loko o ʻelua mau pule, no laila ma ka liʻiliʻi ʻaʻole maikaʻi loa ia. "
Ke hoʻohewa mau nei lākou iā ʻoe
Hoʻokuʻu a hoʻohaʻahaʻa paha nā manipulated iā ʻoe me ka ʻole o ka hoʻomākeʻaka a me ka hoʻomāʻewaʻewa paha. Hoʻolālā ʻia kā lākou mau manaʻo e kāpae aku i kou hilinaʻi iā ʻoe iho.
Makemake lākou e hoʻomāʻewaʻewa a hoʻopilikia iā ʻoe. ʻO ka manawa pinepine, hoʻopuka ka manipulator i kā lākou insecurities ponoʻī.
O kahi laʻana:
- "ʻAʻole anei ʻoe e noʻonoʻo i kahi lole e hōʻike iki ana no ka hālāwai kūkā? Kuhi au ʻo ia kahi ala e loaʻa ai ka waihona. "
- “ʻAi wale nō kāu hana.”
Hoʻohana lākou i kāu palekana ʻole iā ʻoe
Ke ʻike lākou i kāu mau wahi nāwaliwali, hiki iā lākou ke hoʻohana iā lākou e hōʻeha iā ʻoe. Hiki iā lākou ke hana i nā ʻōlelo a hana i nā hana i manaʻo ʻia e waiho iā ʻoe me ke ʻano palupalu a me ka huhū.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Ua ʻōlelo ʻoe ʻaʻole ʻoe e makemake e ulu aʻe kāu mau keiki i kahi home haki. E nānā i kāu mea e hana nei iā lākou i kēia manawa. "
- “He mea hoʻolohe koʻikoʻi kēia. E makaʻu wau inā ʻo wau ʻoe. "
Hoʻohana lākou i kou mau manaʻo kūʻē iā ʻoe
Inā huhū ʻoe, e hoʻāʻo paha kahi mea e hoʻokalakupua iā ʻoe e lawehala i kou mau manaʻo.
Hoʻopiʻi paha lākou iā ʻoe no ke kūpono ʻole a ʻaʻole lawa paha o ka hoʻopukapuka.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Inā ʻoe i aloha maoli iaʻu, ʻaʻole loa ʻoe e nīnau iaʻu."
- "ʻAʻole hiki iaʻu ke lawe i kēlā hana. ʻAʻole wau makemake e kaʻawale loa mai kaʻu mau keiki. "
Hoʻohana lākou i nā huakaʻi hewa a ultimatum paha
I ka wā o kahi kūlike ʻole a hakakā paha, e hōʻike kahi kanaka manipulative i nā ʻōlelo koʻikoʻi i manaʻo ʻia e hoʻokau iā ʻoe i kahi wahi paʻakikī.
E māka lākou i nā nāwaliwali o ka naʻau me nā ʻōlelo hoʻonāukiuki i mea e loaʻa ai kahi noi.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Inā ʻoe e haʻalele iaʻu, ʻaʻole pono wau e ola."
- "Inā ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ma ʻaneʻi i kēia hopena pule, manaʻo wau e hōʻike ana i kāu pae o ka hoʻolaʻa ʻana i kēia keʻena."
Pā ikaika lākou
Hiki i kahi kanaka passive-agresive ke kāpae i ka hakakā. Hoʻohana lākou i ka poʻe a puni ʻoe, e like me nā hoaaloha, e kamaʻilio pū me ʻoe.
E kamaʻilio pū paha lākou ma hope o kou kua i nā hoa hana.
O kahi laʻana:
- "E kamaʻilio wau e pili ana i kēia, akā maopopo iaʻu ua paʻahana loa ʻoe."
- "Ua manaʻo wau ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi inā ʻoe i lohe iā ia mai haʻi ʻē aʻe, ʻaʻole iaʻu ʻoiai pili loa mākou."
Hāʻawi lākou iā ʻoe i ka lāʻau hūnā
ʻAʻole lākou e pane i kāu kāhea, nā leka uila, nā leka pololei, a i ʻole kekahi ʻano o ke kamaʻilio ʻana.
Hoʻohana lākou i ka hāmau e loaʻa ka kaohi a hoʻomaopopo iā ʻoe ke kuleana no kā lākou hana.
ʻLelo a hana paha lākou i kekahi mea a hōʻole ma hope
ʻO kēia ʻenehana i mea e nīnau iā ʻoe i kou hoʻomanaʻo ʻana i nā hanana.
Ke ʻike ʻole ʻoe i kekahi mea e pili ana i ka mea i hiki, hiki iā lākou ke kuhikuhi i ka pilikia ma luna ou, e hoʻomaopopo ai iā ʻoe ke kuleana no ke kuhi hewa ʻana.
O kahi laʻana:
- "ʻAʻole wau i ʻōlelo i kēlā. Ke manaʻo hou nei ʻoe i nā mea. "
- "ʻAʻole wau e hoʻokau i kēlā. ʻIke ʻoe ua hana nui wau. ”
He "mālie loa" lākou i nā manawa a pau i nā manawa pilikia
Loaʻa i nā kānaka Manipulative ka hopena ma mua o ka mea a lākou e hana nei.
Heʻoiaʻiʻo loa kēia i nā hanana i hāpai ʻia i ka naʻau. Pēlā i hiki ai iā lākou ke hoʻohana i kāu hopena ma ke ʻano he ala e hōʻoluʻolu loa ai iā ʻoe.
E ana ʻoe i kāu hopena ma muli o kā lākou, a hoʻoholo ʻaʻole ʻoe i ka laina.
O kahi laʻana:
- “Ua ʻike ʻoe i ka mālie o nā poʻe āpau. Ua huhū loa ʻoe. ”
- "ʻAʻole wau i makemake e ʻōlelo i kekahi mea, akā ua ʻano liʻiliʻi ʻoe i ka kaohi."
Haʻalele lākou iā ʻoe e nīnau nei i kou noʻonoʻo ponoʻī
ʻO Gaslighting kahi hana manipulative kahi e hoʻāʻo ai ka poʻe e hōʻoia iā ʻoe ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hilinaʻi hou i kāu ʻano ponoʻī a i ʻole ʻike.
Hoʻomaopopo lākou iā ʻoe i nā mea i hiki mai kahi ʻano o kou manaʻo. Lilo ʻoe i kahi ʻano maoli.
O kahi laʻana:
- "Maopopo i ka poʻe āpau ʻaʻole pēlā e hana ai kēia."
- "ʻAʻole wau i lohi. Ua poina wale ʻoe i ka manawa aʻu i ʻōlelo ai ma laila wau. "
He aha e hana ai
Lōʻihi paha ka manawa e ʻike ai i kahi kanaka e hoʻokalakupua nei iā ʻoe. Maalea nā hōʻailona, a ke hoʻololi pinepine ʻia i ka manawa.
Akā inā ʻoe e manaʻo e mālama ʻia ʻoe i kēia ala, e hilinaʻi i kāu ʻano.
E kala mai i kāu ʻāpana, a laila neʻe i mua. ʻAʻole paha ʻoe e loaʻa i ke kala ʻana, akā ʻaʻole pono ʻoe e noho pū me ia. Loaʻa iā ʻoe i ka mea āu e ʻike ai he hana maoli ia, a laila ʻaʻole e haʻi iki i nā hoʻopiʻi ʻē aʻe.
Mai hoʻāʻo e paʻi iā lākou. ʻAʻole pono nā kānaka ʻelua e pāʻani i kēia pāʻani. Ma kahi o, e aʻo e ʻike i nā hoʻolālā i hiki ai iā ʻoe ke hoʻomākaukau kūpono i kāu mau pane.
Kau palena. Ke hoʻomaopopo ka mea manipulative e lilo ana lākou i ka kaohi, e ulu nui paha kā lākou mau hana. ʻO kēia ka manawa na ʻoe e hoʻoholo i nā hoʻoholo paʻakikī.
Inā ʻaʻole pono ʻoe e pili kokoke i kēlā kanaka, e noʻonoʻo e ʻokiʻoki iā lākou mai kou ola āpau.
Inā noho pū ʻoe me lākou a hana pū paha, pono ʻoe e aʻo i nā ʻenehana no ka mālama ʻana iā lākou.
Hiki paha iā ʻoe ke ʻike he mea kōkua ke kamaʻilio aku i kahi mea hoʻoponopono a mea aʻoaʻo paha e pili ana i ka mālama ʻana i kēia kūlana.
Hiki iā ʻoe ke kiʻi i kahi hoaaloha hilinaʻi a ʻohana paha o ka ʻohana e kōkua iā ʻoe e ʻike i ka lawena a hoʻokō i nā palena.
Outlook
ʻAʻohe mea e pono i kekahi e mālama iā lākou i kēia ʻano.
ʻAʻole hiki i ka hoʻopili ʻana i ka naʻau ke haʻalele i nā kaha kino, akā hiki ke loaʻa kahi hopena lōʻihi. Hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻōla mai kēia, a hiki iā ʻoe ke ulu aʻe mai ia pū kekahi.
Hiki i kahi mea hoʻoponopono a mea aʻoaʻo paha ke kōkua iā ʻoe e ʻike i nā hiʻohiʻona weliweli. Hiki iā lākou ke kōkua iā ʻoe e aʻo i nā ala e kū ai i ka hana a lana ka manaʻo.
Inā ʻoe ma ʻAmelika Hui Pū ʻIa, hiki iā ʻoe ke kāhea i ka National Domestic Violence Hotline ma 800-799-7233.
Hoʻopili kēia laina hotline huna 24/7 iā ʻoe me nā mea kākoʻo i aʻo ʻia i hiki ke hoʻolako i nā kumuwaiwai a me nā pono hana e kōkua iā ʻoe e palekana.